The success measured against the performance of others (Today’s world of competition)
The Jealous mindset
Are you sad when others succeed? Does someone else failure determine your success?
“Keeping up with the Joneses” is an expression that is commonly used to describe the attitude of always wanting to keep up with the neighbours in terms of possessions and wanting to have the things that our neighbours have.
Envy is another word that can be used to describe this frame of mind. This is a very appropriate word because it encompasses greed, jealousy, resentment and a strong desire for something somebody else has, usually at whatever cost.
The winning mindset – origins
Unfortunately, it is an attitude that is common. Throughout our childhood and most of our adult life, competition is the order of the day. Right from our school days we are taught that our self worth is measured in relation to other people.
At school, our grading system gives you a number at the end of the term. If you “pass with number one” that means you are the best in your class. If you “pass with number 25” that means there are 24 other kids that perform better than you are. So if you want to be number one and “win” you must make sure that all the other kids “lose” and pass number two or more.
Wait a minute though, why can’t all the kids in class pass number one? Why must we make comparism between one child and another? A simple pass or fail remark on the report card might be sufficient without necessarily stating numbers. Unfortunately for children, parents take these numbers very seriously.
This carries on through life. The boss must ensure that he does not allow his juniors to get too much knowledge or qualifications if he is to keep his number one spot as the top dog in the company. In fact, at times he must deliberately frustrate any efforts by his subordinates to progress.
Even amongst friends and relatives this occurs. Sibling rivalry does not always end when children grow up. A lot of times it continues. The success of one child in adulthood is measured against the success of another. It seems whatever we have achieved seems insignificant when compared to what so and so has done or acquired.